role reversal

Today, on my one year anniversary of working at Coffee Bean, I got written up for having a poor attitude.

I've worked, at one place or another, for five years, and I've never received a write up, ever. Naturally, I didn't take it well.

One thing that stuck out to me is hearing, "It seems as if you're always bringing anger that comes up outside of work into the workplace." One year ago, that was absolutely true. I was dealing with problems with my home life, and social life, and virtually my own health, and I was carrying that around everywhere with me. But then I look at my life now and can only say that I am the happiest I have been in... well, maybe ever. So the irony is that instead of bringing life related drama into the workplace, I'm bringing work-related drama into my life. How's that for reversal?!

I love going back and reading the last few blogs I've written. I think one of the most phenomenally empowering thing to see is your own happiness. To reflect on that only improves your mood.

I have the absolute greatest best friends ever. Without the three of them I would be nothing. James and Amber are the perfect blend of a comforting friend and a partner in crime. They are truly my pillars, and I know wherever they go, whatever they do I will always have them; with them, I don't have to worry about bullshit drama and ridiculous lies. The most straightforward, blunt, harsh people are the greatest ones in the world; and I got them. Hannah: FTW.

And then there's Blackwelder: God damn I'm lucky. With the exception of Jamber up there, I've never gotten to realize how much of a gift it is to have a friend who is constantly supportive of everything you do. I'm sort of a "best friend whore" and it is true that it seems that at many times in my life I've written this same blog about some other person who inevitably let me down, and though I doubt it, who knows what will happen with Steven and I, but I can say this: he has been the greatest asset and the greatest gift to me these last few months. I don't think anyone will be able to step in between our friendship. It may be questionable, but what matters is that we know it's strong.

Honorable mention (and let me state how very, truly, honorable it is) goes to Timmy Chisham, my favorites in Sleep Cyclops, Sleep, and my brothers Colton and the She Sells Sea Shells. Timmy has been around forever, and to be honest is a blunt, vulgar, insensitive, brutal asshole; and if he were anything different we wouldn't be friends. I can always count on him to run off on random adventures and accomplish things I didn't think I'd ever do. He's the only person I can be cripplingly disgusting with without breaking a sweat.

The SCS boys are really something special. These kids have everything a friend could ask for. I support everything they do and are going to do so much, it's ridiculous. They are always there with stories and advice and just the sort of general nonsense that makes you adore a group of beatnicks. They're all very talented, and I'm truly blessed to be close with such an outstanding group of guys. o]

You've probably heard me bitch and moan about being in a band, but it's only because of who I have to stand up with on stage. Colton, Robb, Walter, and Hollis are four of the most phenomenal musicians I've ever met, and they only keep getting better. Imagine my fear of getting the opportunity to surround myself with a kickass group of artists?! All nerves and complaints aside, I'm stoked on the opportunity to make something happen with these guys. I think I'm going to start getting my shit together and prove that I can pull my weight with the greats.

....Oh yeah, I went there. GOODNIGHT.