we'll sing the blues.

This weekend has been hard, to say the least. James and Amber finally really left California to move back to Ohio. By now they are probably driving somewhere through middle-America, but the point is they aren't here...and it sucks.

For the past year or so those two have kind of been my pillars. Amber is basically my mental-twin, and with her I get to have massive road rage, gang up on people, and just generally be blunt and awesome. James is the complete opposite, and unless he is running away from the fight Amber and I were always bound to start, he's always been there to offer advice and comfort.

It's not like I'll never see them again, but the fact is, they aren't here now. I'm horribly selfish and I like knowing that when I need my best friends they are nearby, and if they need me I am also right there. But I also understand that they needed to go home. With family troubles, money problems and a wedding to plan, California just wasn't the place for them right now. I'm so grateful that they were here, and that Amber made James approach me that night at Soapbox. With their love and support I've managed to complete an EP (with a full-length album on the way), get out of horribly damaging relationships/friendships, and basically start anew. I owe them a lot. And I miss them so much already. I can't wait for it to be summer so I can put all my money into getting across the country to see them. I can only hope that in moving back they get that huge weight lifted off of their shoulders that California seemed to pile on.

I wish I could have made things easier for them while they were here. It seems that everyone is moving on and moving away, and maybe since I've been here my entire life I'm blind to all the trouble that LA is. It's been my home forever and the traffic and the homeless and the material dependency is the only thing I know. The fact is, I'm not sure I could ever live anywhere else; not forever, anyways.

(Photo below by Tim Chisham)